#oops?]

robert enters through the double doors and greets the receptionist, dropping beef off at chase's cubicle before making a detour to the coffee machine in the breakroom, then sits down at his desk. there's a bunch of thin cracks in the wall. ugh. maintenance must be slacking.

the z-team is barely listening, abandoning tasks and sniping back at him. they keep calling him weak, annoying, useless, they ask for another dispatcher. robert doesn't know what crawled up their ass and died this morning, but it's annoying as fuck. he thought he built a better relationship with them. he feels a headache come up.

during lunchtime, sonar and coupe get into an argument, but when robert tries step in, they turn it on him. flambae has decided robert stole his noodles, and shoves him hard into the counter. fantastic.

he tries to talk about it with chase, voicing his complaints about the z-team. chase tells him they should have cut all of them and thrown them in jail a long time ago. it's... a weird answer, it rubs robert the wrong way. they've made a lot of progress, right?

"you're gonna end up like your father," chase says, "he was just as indecisive. and look where that got him."

robert feels stunned. he can barely get his reply out. "what?"

chase is quiet for a moment. his brows knit to a frown. he looks up. "robert. you have to--"

>>>

it's a normal day at the SDN office.

robert enters through the double doors and greets the receptionist, dropping beef off at chase's cubicle before making a detour to the coffee machine in the breakroom, then sits down at his desk. when he looks up, he sees the cracks are bigger, webbing out. is maintenance not going to fix that?

the z-team is chaos, shouting over each other, like the loudest voice will win. sonar keeps diverting his course. invisigal refuses every task. prism doesn't stop calling him a bitch, and flambae joins in. he can't reach blond blazer. waterboy stutters so bad he's unintelligible. robert's headache is getting worse.

conversation falls quiet when he enters the breakroom during lunchtime. the z-team ignores him, for some reason. he wasn't even that hard on them. golem shoves him over, and everyone laughs. robert is about to get back at them, when invisigal appears and pulls him out of the room. she seems nervous.

"this team is driving me up the wall," he says. "glad to see you've decided to be less of a pain today."

invisigal looks at him, intently, like she has trouble seeing him. "robert. you have to wake up."

robert huffs out a humorless laugh, holding up his paper cup of coffee sludge. "working on it."

"no, robert," she says. "this isn't--"

>>>

it's a normal day at the SDN office.

robert enters through the double doors, greets the receptionist, then goes to drop beef off at chase's desk. but he's stopped before he can put his chubby pet down.

"keep the dirty mongrel with you," chase tells him. "don't want his filth at my desk."

robert stands there, mouth open. "excuse me? what the fuck did you just-"

>>>

it's a normal day at the SDN office.

robert enters through the double doors and greets the receptionist, who doesn't greet him back. it's quiet at the office. he drops beef off at chase's cubicle. his headache is worse, throbbing. he foregoes the coffee.

the cracks are bigger, drywall is flaking out. nobody else seems to care.

the intercom doesn't work, or maybe it works, but no one answers. robert presses the buttons, talking into the mic. only after a few minutes does the team come in, and robert lets them know they're late. it gets him an avalanche of noise and cussing for his troubles. it worsens his headache.

malevola's mic crackles, pitched with static. she tries to say something, but no matter which buttons he presses, he can't hear her.

during lunchtime, robert tells the team to get their shit together. they don't take it well.

"who the fuck do you think you are? you fucking stuck-up asshole."

"that's rich coming from the whiny bitch who can't even function without his daddy's robot suit."

his headache pulses. "shut up."

"you're just jealous because you fucked up your father's legacy. crawling over here to beg for handouts. you'll never live up to him, everyone knows that."

"useless. so useless. what do you even hope to achieve? fucking nothing."

"you're worthless, a waste of fucking space. should have done everyone a favor and died right, mecha failure."

robert's head throbs. he balls his hands to fists. "shut the fuck up."

"robert?"

he turns.

prism is looking at him. her form seems to waver a bit, like shimmery light. "robert?"

robert stares at her.

"robert, listen to me, you're--"

>>>

it's a normal day at the SDN office.

robert's headache is worse. he walks up to chase's cubicle, but chase doesn't look at him, doesn't say anything. robert's hands are empty. he doesn't know why he went there in the first place. he sits down at his desk. his head hurts.

the cracks are big, very big, all over the wall. something drips out of it, some black kind of liquid. it looks almost like blood.

the z-team is being destructive; they bust up the piping system of a building, destroy a shop to stop robbers, mess up a public speaking conference. flambae is inactive, nobody tells him why. he's pretty sure some of them are drunk. they don't listen to him.

robert leans down to pet beef, but beef isn't there. he tries to ask chase, but there is no answer.

the doors to the office space bust open, slamming the walls. flambae storms in, tearing between the cubicles with a kind of reckless disregard that is unusual, even for him. robert is fed up. he's angry, his head hurts, he's tired.

he shoves away from his desk. "what the fuck do you think--"

flambae stops right in front of him, the look on his face is... off. worried, almost. he looks harried. somehow, his suit is even stranger against the office backdrop than normal, like it doesn't quite fit.

"wake up, robert, fuck!" flambae snaps. he reaches out his hands, but it's like he can't quite reach robert. "it's not real! it's killing you! none of this is--!"

>>>

it's a normal day at the SDN office.

robert sits in his chair. the cracks have reached the floor. he thinks his nose is bleeding, but he isn't sure. blood drips all over his keyboard. it's black. he can't find beef. chase still doesn't talk to him.

blond blazer is standing beside him. the look in her eyes is disappointed. "i thought you'd be better than this," she says. "we needed a hero. a real one."

"i am," robert says. "i am a real hero."

she shakes her head. "you failed. you're not enough."

during lunchtime, the breakroom is empty. he makes his coffee alone, takes one sip, then empties it in the sink and dumps the cup into the trash.

flambae is leaning against the counter. "i am going to break all of your teeth, mecha bitch," he says. "you are gonna wish you died when your trash suit fell out the sky."

"we went over this, flambae," robert says. "stop, or i will--"

"no one will help you," flambae continues, "such a nuisance. i will do everyone a favor by finishing what your cowardly ass started. everyone will be better off."

"yeah, well, get in line," robert says. he can't come up with something better. his mind feels like sludge.

flambae huffs. "better if you saved me the trouble and did it yourself."

they stand in silence for a moment. robert is leaning back on his good leg, leaving his side open in case he needs to duck and throw a punch. nothing. flambae stares at the ground, like he's thinking.

"this is not good, bob-bob," he says then, soft, his tone a 180 from a minute ago. he looks up. "just don't listen to... don't listen, okay?"

robert huffs. "when do i ever?"

flambae looks sad. robert doesn't think he's ever really seen that before. for a moment, it seems like flambae wants to say more.

the crack widens.

>>>

—

3 shots later and nursing a cooler, the alcohol is hitting you and you can almost convince yourself that you can have a normal night.

except amber knows you well enough now to know that you’re always extra affectionate after a few drinks, prone to leaning on your friends and lingering touches. 

so of course she notices when you aren’t like that tonight. it’s not that you don’t want to touch her. of course you do, even more now that the buzz from the drinks you’ve had are removing some of your usual hesitancy. 

it’s just that every time you get close enough to reach a hand out, every time you feel her brush up against you, your mind conjures images from your dreams that you’re trying your best to forget. 

so, you’ve resolved to keep your distance, at least for tonight, and you’re concentrating extra hard through the haze of alcohol to stay away, even though every instinct in your body pulls you towards her. 

you make sure to keep either alysa or isabeau between you and amber at all times, and at first you think maybe you’re succeeding, that maybe it’s not noticeable. but alysa keeps giving you concerned looks every time you lean away from amber, and now even isabeau seems to be catching on, looking between you and amber like there’s a puzzle to figure out. 

—

once you get to the house, alysa and isabeau disappear almost immediately, pulled away into a game of beer pong. 

you glare at alysa, you can’t believe she’s just going to leave you alone with amber like this, but she just shrugs apologetically as she lets herself get dragged away. 

once they’re gone, you just stand there, trying to stay as still as possible. you can feel the heat of amber’s body beside you, and somehow you know her eyes are on you, daring you to look, but you’re too stubborn to concede. 

you're already flustered tonight, exhausted from trying to keep your distance. 

amber of course notices, because she’s amber. 

all at once, amber’s attention on you plus the blaring music and bodies crowding in the small room are overwhelming. you make some half-assed excuse to amber as you push away from her, heading outside for air. 

you can’t bring yourself to look back, but you can perfectly picture the concerned look you’re sure she has on her face, eyes following you as you head to the backyard. 

—

you’re outside, leaning against the porch railing, letting the night air soothe you.

there’s a group of people standing a few feet away, sharing a joint. the slightly sour smell wafts over, invading your senses. 

it’s comforting, in a weird way, brings you back to quiet nights spent with alysa, deep conversations late into the night. 

it’s probably only been ten minutes, but it feels like it’s been hours when amber appears beside you. 

she just stands beside you for a minute, before she opens her mouth to speak.

‘y/n,’ she says, letting it hang there. 

you look over at her, finally, too tired to keep pretending. 

‘what’s going on with you?’ she asks. 

‘i’m not stupid,’ she continues. ‘‘i know you’ve been.. i know there’s something wrong. and alysa said—’ she stops there, but you can fill in the blanks. your stomach sinks. 

god you’re going to kill alysa. you can’t believe she told amber. 

but it’s out in the open now, and you can’t deny it any longer. 

‘i’m sorry’ you rush out, words tripping over each other. maybe if you say this fast enough you can forget it ever happened, and everything will go back to normal, how it was before you had to mess it all up. 

it’s obvious amber has figure it out, and you just hope she’ll still want to be your friend after this is all over. 

‘i didn’t mean to—’ you continue. ‘i wasn’t trying to make you uncomfortable, i just.. i’ll back off, okay? i already have been, i just thought—’

amber is already shaking her head, stepping closer.

‘y/n—’

but you’re not listening, because of course this is how this was going to go. of course. you feel stupid now, standing there, everything laid out and wrong.

‘it’s fine,’ you cut in quickly, even though it’s not. ‘really, i get it. we can just— go back to normal. you don’t have to say anything, i—’

you look away, jaw tight, already taking a step back.

‘i should probably just..’

she reaches out then, grabs your wrist. 

‘y/n.’ she repeats.

there’s something in her voice that makes you pause, but you can’t bring yourself to look up at her yet. 

‘i’m not rejecting you!’ she finally blurts. 

you blink. turn back, slowly. 

‘what?’

you’re not sure if you misheard. you need her to repeat herself, to explain.

amber lets out a breath, like she’s been holding it this whole time. ‘i’ve been trying to tell you that i like you.’ 

all you can do is stare at her, trying to catch up. 

‘like—’ you gesture vaguely between the two of you, ‘like like me?’

she huffs out a quiet laugh, almost disbelieving. ‘yes. like like you. for..’ she shakes her head a little, for a while now.’

everything in your brain kind of just stalls at that. 

‘but i thought—’ you start, then stop, you’re half convinced this is just another dream. 

amber steps closer, careful, like she’s giving you room to pull away if you still want to. 

you don’t. you never really did.

‘i thought you were avoiding me,’ she says, softer now. ‘i thought you knew and were trying to let me down easy.’

‘no,’ you say immediately, shaking your head. ‘no, i was—’ you let out a breath, a little helpless. ‘i had a sex dream about you and then i panicked.’

there’s a beat.

you cringe, can’t believe you just admitted that. 

amber just stares at you. 

‘you what?’

you squeeze your eyes shut for a second. ‘yeah. so. that’s where i’ve been.’

there’s another pause, and for a split second you panic, if you haven’t already ruined everything surely this has. 

but amber just lets out a laugh, surprised, a little breathless. 

‘oh my god,’ she says, like she can’t believe it. ‘that’s why?’

you nod, mortified. ‘yeah. that’s why.’

she shakes her head, smiling now, something softer settling into her expression.

‘you’re unbelievable.’

‘in a bad way or..’

she doesn’t let you finish. this time when she steps in, she doesn’t hesitate.

her hand comes up to your jaw, steadying you for half a second like she’s giving you the chance to pull back. 

when you don’t, she kisses you.

—

it’s quick at first, almost like she’s testing it, soft, careful. like she’s not entirely sure you’re real, that this is happening.

you freeze. for a second, you don’t move at all, brain going completely blank.

then it hits you.

and suddenly you’re kissing her back.

it’s messy, a little off at first, the two of you catching on each other, but then it settles, clicks into something that feels almost too natural.

your hand finds her sleeve, gripping like you need something to anchor you.

she makes a quiet sound against your mouth, like relief more than anything else.

when you pull back, it’s only barely, foreheads almost touching, both of you breathing a little uneven.

you blink at her.

‘oh.’

amber lets out a soft laugh, just as breathless. ‘yeah.’

you stare at her for another second, then— ‘okay. yeah.’

her expression shifts then, like she’s making a decision. 

‘do you wanna get out of here?’ she asks, a little quieter now. ‘isabeau’s not staying at the dorm tonight.’ 

you hesitate for like a half a second, before nodding.

‘yeah. yeah, i—yeah.’

her eyes sparkle in amusement at you, but you can see the relief hiding further underneath. her hand finds yours without thinking this time, and you don’t pull away, just grip harder. 

she turns to start the walk back to her dorm, pulling you by the hand, and you follow easily. 

—

you’re confident until you get to amber’s room. the door closes, and in the quiet of her dorm, you realize it’s just you and amber, and there’s no more distractions, no more secrets to hide behind. 

suddenly you find yourself getting a little shy, a little nervous. there’s been a couple boys in the past, nothing too serious, but you realize that this might be your first time with a girl. you can’t stop the blush that rises to your face as you look at amber’s bed, right there. you don’t want to be presumptuous, but…

amber must notice your sudden hesitancy, of course she does. she walks over and sits on the edge of her bed, tilts her head up at you, searching. 

‘you okay?’ she asks, soft, eyes never leaving your face. 

your blush deepens at that, amber’s sole attention on you. 

‘no, yeah! it’s just..’ you trail off, not sure how to explain. not sure if you want to. you suddenly feel awkward, standing in front of amber. you’re not sure what to do with your hands. 

amber just waits, patient, face open. 

‘i just—i’ve never.. with a girl,’ you offer, a little embarrassed now. 

‘oh baby,’ she coos. her shoulders fall, relief evident in her eyes. ‘that’s okay.’ 

‘we can slow down,’ she offers. 

you shake your head. ‘no i—’

you don't know what to say, how to explain yourself, so you just step forward and reach for amber instead, leaning down to kiss her, hard. 

she responds eagerly, before catching herself, pulling back. ‘are you sure? we don’t have to do anything right now.’ you can tell she’s sincere. 

‘amber,’ you say, ‘please.’

‘okay,’ she exhales a laugh, before pulling you down to kiss you again. she shifts a little to lie down on the bed, pulling you down to lie on top of her. her hands run down your sides before going back up, under your shirt, sliding up your back. 

she pulls back from where she was against your neck, ‘take this off?’ she asks, pulling at your shirt.

you nod, sitting up. you lift your arms up and she helps you pull it off. 

‘you too,’ you say, nodding to her shirt. 

she leans back to take her own shirt off, throwing it somewhere beside her on the floor before reaching for you again, hands cupping your cheeks, to kiss you. 

after a little while, you open your mouth a little, and she takes the hint, pokes her tongue out, testing you.

you open your mouth wider at that, letting out a little moan. she takes the opportunity to slide her tongue into her mouth fully now, and you respond. your tongues meet, wet and hot. you both groan at the contact. amber slides her hands down from your face and around your back, pulling you into her. 

you can’t help yourself from grinding down automatically onto the leg amber has slotted in between yours. 

you freeze, worried you’re going too fast but amber just slides her hands down to your ass, pulls you against her thigh harder, flexing so that you can rub against her. 

‘keep going,’ she breathes. 

at her permission, your body takes over and you grind down again, harder this time. you lean your forehead against amber’s as your hips continue shifting. you’re both breathing hard now, and you feel amber getting restless underneath you. 

she taps at your legs, getting you to lift up off her so that she can move. 

you stand up to take your pants off, while amber watches you lazily from where she’s still lying down, before she slides hers off too. you lay back down on top of amber, and she snakes her arms around your waist to hug you, before she rolls you over so that now she’s laying on top of you. 

she props herself up on her elbows, chest brushing against yours, as she leans down to continue kissing you. it’s softer now, she’s taking her time with you, indulging. 

eventually, you can’t help the way your hips start lifting up into hers, trying to find some semblance of pressure. 

you huff in frustration at the lack of pressure, and she pulls back to look at you, sees how needy you are for her, how desperate you’re getting. 

amber winks, ‘don’t worry baby, I'll take good care of you.’

then she’s sliding down your body to slot herself between your legs. she places a kiss right above your knee, before continuing higher.

she slides her hands up your thighs, then leans down to nose at your hip before she finally moves to lick at your cunt. she’s slow at first, licking once along the length of you. testing you out, before she looks up to see your reaction.

at the first feel of her mouth on you, you exhale loud, eyes closing. you reach out to bury your hands in her hair, trying to pull her back to where you need her.

you can’t believe how good it feels, her mouth, hot and wet between your legs.

she flattens her tongue to drag across your cunt, before switching to pulse on your clit. 

you cry out at that, ‘ahh—amber!’ it’s all you can say.

her name turns into moans, and she licks at you harder, hands gripping your thighs to keep your shifting hips in place, encouraged by the sounds you can’t help but make.

when you realize how loud you’re being, you bring a hand up to cover your mouth, trying to stop the noises from escaping.

when amber notices what you’re doing, she stops, looks up at you. 

you almost come right there, seeing her looking up at you from between your thighs, lipstick smeared over her face, chin slick with you. she reaches up for the hand that's covering your mouth and pulls it away.

‘don’t,’ she murmurs. voice rough and low, ‘wanna hear you.’ 

at that, you let your head fall back against the mattress with a groan, eyes rolling back. 

‘that’s it, baby,’ you can hear the smile in her voice now, ‘just like that.’

—

you wake up to the sun blinding you. you’re confused at first, not recognizing where you are, until the night before comes rushing back in, along with a pounding in your head you had been hoping to do without. you groan, turning back over to avoid the sun. 

‘morning,’ amber whispers. ‘how you feeling?’

‘ughhh,’ is all you can say. 

amber laughs, eyes soft. 

it’s then that the door gets pushed open.

you turn to amber, eyes wide, but she just rolls her eyes, ‘isabeau,’ she groans. ‘if you leave right now without a word and don’t come back for another two hours i will buy you coffee for the rest of the week.’

‘make it a month and i'm sold.’ 

‘ugh whatever just, get out,’ amber reaches out for a pillow to throw towards the door where isabeau is still standing, wide grin on her face. 

‘just wait until alysa hears about this,’ you hear her say as she leaves, letting the door slam behind her on the way out. 

‘oh my goddd,’ you drop your head into the mattress beside amber, ‘we’re never gonna hear the end of this are we?’

‘no,’ she breathes out a laugh. ‘worth it though,’ you hear the question in it that she won’t dare to ask.

‘so worth it,’ you confirm, snuggling back into amber.